John North

Two Poems

I Am

There was a time he could fix anything
– opening the Telegraph on his iPad –
on a tractor himself
– scraping his mother’s jam on his toast –

everything was done by hand
– the printing press is dead –
with a gripe, and they’d pile the shit up on the midden
– but you wouldn’t want to go back –

nobody had any money in them days
– the government is a mess –
and you can’t stop progress
– that’s democracy for you –

he remembers when cows had horns
– he is the VIIth of his name –
and bulls did the bulling
– as old as the oaks –

the best website for the weather
– pouring his cup of tea –
pass the baby over here, hello little lad
– I put more toast in the toaster –

wash the units after breakfast
– I suspect he’s the best man these acres have ever seen –
and look the beasts in the meder
– You’re not wrong, say the dead, I am.


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